Actually I'm quite surprised that I haven't gained more weight than I have. I've gained about 3 pounds since the Beginning of December. I blame it on my holiday cooking and luscious fudge. Not only am I a gourmet cook, but I am also one hell of a good baker. I'm not really too worried about the weight because some of it is most likely water bloating. I'll take my water pill this morning. I didn't take them Fri-Sun because we were shopping and all that. I didn't want to be running to the Macy's potty every 10 minutes.
Nonetheless, I am the cookie/fudge king. I like Christmas and what would Christmas be like without cookies? So I baked and decorated dozens upon dozens. I have my fudge down to an art. The first time I tried to make the fudge, I did it the hard way bringing the mix up to 238 degrees ect... and they turned out sugar grainy even though I used confectioners sugar. I made ginger bread, sugar, and Hungarian Pecan cookies as well, but here is my sure fire fudge recipe... It's so easy it's stupid and the fudge comes out perfect every time:
First I put about 2 tablespoons of butter into a medium sized pan and let it melt without burning. Then I add one can of condensed sweet milk plus 1 1/2 to 2 cups of sugar and a dash of salt then I bring it to a boil while stirring like a crazed man so it doesn't burn. Then I remove it from the heat and add chocolate chips (doesn't really matter what kind. You choose.) and a good cup to a cup and a half of small marshmallows or jet puffed marshmallow cream for the jar. Finally, I add the optional nuts and stir it all together until it is completely and evenly chocolate color. Then pour it out evenly into a glass pan or something that allows the fudge to spread out to an inch or so thick.
Yesterday I tried adding 1 1/2 tablespoons of vanilla extract and Ghirardelli white chocolate chips with almost two cups of chopped pecans. KILLER GOOD!
Now the trick is to eat and taste just a bit while cooking and then stay away from the finished product. Yea right. Just remember that, if you've had bariatric surgery, your body is going to try to keep as much of the fat in the fudge as possible. My weight loss really stagnated, but I can get back into the ballgame in two or three days.
Back pain: I think the shifting fat (downwards) has pulled on my back which resulted in a spasm pain that wrapped around my entire abdomen. I had to start wearing this funky back brace just to stand up. Today I'll call the doctor and see if he wants to check out my spleen or anything because sometimes the pain can be quiet severe. I wonder... is this phenomena common amongst bariatric patients?
Monday, December 19, 2011
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Yet another band adjustment and a new weight loss sprint
Yesterday I had another saline injection into my port. The surgeon suggested 1/2 cc and I suggested 1cc so we met in the middle and went with 3/4 cc. I should have asked him how many total cc's I have had. By my estimation, I've probably maybe had about 6 3/4 cc. I don't know what the average is. However; I do know that I now have to be patient and careful taking my bipolar meds. I can't take more than one at a time and I have to let each one settle through the opening otherwise they seem to get stuck and that's a bitch. Anyway, I've only been eating hot cream of wheat (Maybe you folks in Russia know what grits are. Basically the same thing). For the first time I really have to let liquids settle through. If I drink cold water or iced tea I can feel it sit there. It goes down fairly quickly, but I still have to be mindful.
I did have a blood test result that showed that my liver and kidney functions have come down closer to high end normal. It's a good thing. I know that the 20 to 30% of my liver that is working is doing a good job. I didn't have a platelet count done, but I should have. I imagine it hasn't changed much. It's probably bouncing around 70,000 to 90,000 (150,000 being low end normal and 250,000 normal). I am seriously low on vitamin D3. I've been taking 6,000IU, but they have been gelcaps and they haven't done a thing. My primary care physician has instructed me to take 5,000 to 6,000IU of tablet form of vitamin D3. And, I should try to take them with food to slow the absorption. As far as nutrition goes, I'm doing fine with the high protein diet and bariatric supplements. I have been getting B12 injections every month from the surgeon.
I had a mess of a time with my insurance and the surgeon's billing service. The invoices showed that I owed $750 USD as a co-pay. I talked to the insurance at length because I didn't understand why I was paying an 80/20 split on the surgeon bill when I didn't have to on the hospital bill. And then they said that I had to meet the co-pay minimum and I told them that I already paid the hospital $4,500 USD and that should more than cover any co-pay requirements. My biggest concern really wasn't about the $750, it was really that I thought I was being cheated out of my lifetime benefit of $7,500 USD. They paid the hospital their $4,500 (and I paid my $4,500) so they are all taken care of; however, they only paid the surgeon $1,250 leaving $1,750 yet to be paid. As I know understand it, the insurance will keep paying for the "adjustments" until they have exhausted the $1,750. So, I'm not going to lose the $1,750. I have a friend who's insurance paid for the surgery, but then only paid for a few of the "adjustment" appointments and now she's on her own and she can't afford to have the adjustments so she's kind of screwed. All that money; all that effort and she's stuck.
My damaged cartilage feels better so I hit the gym yesterday and today. Yesterday I took it easy and only walked on the treadmill. Well, kind of speed walking. I don't know how fast I completed the 2 miles, but today I did and I broke my old record just walking like a madman instead of jogging. I figure that as long as I don't jog or run I shouldn't be re-injuring it. After yesterday my left MCL hurt, but I know that pain and it's just inflammation and I can ice down for that. Anyway, today I played basketball against myself for 45 mins to an hour (not sure again) and I worked up a healthy sweat. Then I went back to the gym and there was no treadmills available so I worked out on the machines until one became available. It's usually not that busy and there are plenty of mills, but there was the entire retirement community there today??? So I got on the treadmill and did 2 miles in exactly 31 minutes which I think is good because I am still getting over an injury.
One last thought: My bipolar disorder is becoming more intense as I age. I do have my meds adjusted, but sometimes I'm barely able to keep it together. Not so many panic attacks, but more manic behavior. Bless my wife for not choking me in my sleep. Also, the weight loss and the exercise have done nothing to improve my chronic spleen pain so I still have to take oxycodone twice a day. I think it's a low dose and it only takes enough of the pain so it becomes tolerable.
I did have a blood test result that showed that my liver and kidney functions have come down closer to high end normal. It's a good thing. I know that the 20 to 30% of my liver that is working is doing a good job. I didn't have a platelet count done, but I should have. I imagine it hasn't changed much. It's probably bouncing around 70,000 to 90,000 (150,000 being low end normal and 250,000 normal). I am seriously low on vitamin D3. I've been taking 6,000IU, but they have been gelcaps and they haven't done a thing. My primary care physician has instructed me to take 5,000 to 6,000IU of tablet form of vitamin D3. And, I should try to take them with food to slow the absorption. As far as nutrition goes, I'm doing fine with the high protein diet and bariatric supplements. I have been getting B12 injections every month from the surgeon.
I had a mess of a time with my insurance and the surgeon's billing service. The invoices showed that I owed $750 USD as a co-pay. I talked to the insurance at length because I didn't understand why I was paying an 80/20 split on the surgeon bill when I didn't have to on the hospital bill. And then they said that I had to meet the co-pay minimum and I told them that I already paid the hospital $4,500 USD and that should more than cover any co-pay requirements. My biggest concern really wasn't about the $750, it was really that I thought I was being cheated out of my lifetime benefit of $7,500 USD. They paid the hospital their $4,500 (and I paid my $4,500) so they are all taken care of; however, they only paid the surgeon $1,250 leaving $1,750 yet to be paid. As I know understand it, the insurance will keep paying for the "adjustments" until they have exhausted the $1,750. So, I'm not going to lose the $1,750. I have a friend who's insurance paid for the surgery, but then only paid for a few of the "adjustment" appointments and now she's on her own and she can't afford to have the adjustments so she's kind of screwed. All that money; all that effort and she's stuck.
My damaged cartilage feels better so I hit the gym yesterday and today. Yesterday I took it easy and only walked on the treadmill. Well, kind of speed walking. I don't know how fast I completed the 2 miles, but today I did and I broke my old record just walking like a madman instead of jogging. I figure that as long as I don't jog or run I shouldn't be re-injuring it. After yesterday my left MCL hurt, but I know that pain and it's just inflammation and I can ice down for that. Anyway, today I played basketball against myself for 45 mins to an hour (not sure again) and I worked up a healthy sweat. Then I went back to the gym and there was no treadmills available so I worked out on the machines until one became available. It's usually not that busy and there are plenty of mills, but there was the entire retirement community there today??? So I got on the treadmill and did 2 miles in exactly 31 minutes which I think is good because I am still getting over an injury.
One last thought: My bipolar disorder is becoming more intense as I age. I do have my meds adjusted, but sometimes I'm barely able to keep it together. Not so many panic attacks, but more manic behavior. Bless my wife for not choking me in my sleep. Also, the weight loss and the exercise have done nothing to improve my chronic spleen pain so I still have to take oxycodone twice a day. I think it's a low dose and it only takes enough of the pain so it becomes tolerable.
Saturday, November 26, 2011
Back from NYC
I hadn't realized how long it had been between posts. I was under a deadline to finish a polished Part One (143 pgs) to hand over to a publisher in NYC on the 23rd. That was accomplished and now I need to polish Part Two. The characters are very much alive in my head so it shouldn't require nearly as many rewrites. I have posted some of my favorite chapters from part one on the www.NightInPositano.com I showed it to several people and they went bananas. Plus I already have one Independent Film producer interested in the book. It really reads more like a screen play anyway.
My primary mission for NYC was to attend the opening of the Paul Sharits solo exhibition at the Greene Naftali Gallery in the Chelsea district on Manhattan. The show is awesome and very tasteful. If you are able to make in to NYC go see it. We have two films showing, Third Degree Burn three projector installation and the single projector Axionmatic Granularity. We had a Champagne opening from 11am to 1pm and then a private dinner at 9pm in this fancy Japanese restaurant in midtown. I had two interviews with two art critique magazines and then a two hour video interview for the documentary which premiers this spring. I was burnt out on interviews so I made the film crew cram into my small hotel room. I literally did a John Lennon and did the whole interview propped up against my pillows in bed.
After the interview, we all went down to the Occupy Wall Street headquarters located on the second floor of a college again in midtown. It was kind of scary. For promoting peaceful protests, I wouldn't be surprised if they get violent. The graffiti that was covering the walls and some of the floor sounded pretty militant. I sat in on three different conversations and they all had different goals with two common threads; they wanted to keep "occupying" this school or move on to the next. The other thing that was in the air was the fear of being raided. It was around 7pm and there wasn't that many people in the space so I would think they would have gotten raided during their planning meeting at 8pm. We successfully left the building before it was raided, but we did see several police vans parked within a block of the space. I did collect OWS propaganda newspapers and various printed material including a rough blue print to interrupt the Macy's Day Parade. I couldn't believe they just had it sitting in the old protest signs. One thing is for sure; they don't have a central goal further than being pissed off and occupying things.
After that we took a taxi down to ground zero and we found that the visitors center was really a crowded gift shop. I found it revolting and we left quickly.
While we were there both the Whitney and MoMA were closed for Tuesday, but I have some power in NYC and Greg and I were allowed in with a curator tour. The museums were empty. It's a great way to see the art. I spoke at the opening dinner and it went very well. I have no problem with public speaking and I decided what to talk about in about 30 seconds. My speech was cohesive and well received.
We flew back on Thanksgiving and the airports were nearly empty. It was awesome. I went to the Macy's Day Parade and somehow managed to get a spot three people back in Times Square. By the evening we were back in Colorado and eating Thanksgiving Dinner at my brother's house. It was the perfect day.
The bottom line is that I weighed in at 333 which represents 77 pounds lost since my surgery on August 3rd. I should pass the New Years eve at 320 or less. I should be 280 pounds by my birthday on March 19th. The best present ever. I will be at my ideal weight by December 2012 at the latest.
My primary mission for NYC was to attend the opening of the Paul Sharits solo exhibition at the Greene Naftali Gallery in the Chelsea district on Manhattan. The show is awesome and very tasteful. If you are able to make in to NYC go see it. We have two films showing, Third Degree Burn three projector installation and the single projector Axionmatic Granularity. We had a Champagne opening from 11am to 1pm and then a private dinner at 9pm in this fancy Japanese restaurant in midtown. I had two interviews with two art critique magazines and then a two hour video interview for the documentary which premiers this spring. I was burnt out on interviews so I made the film crew cram into my small hotel room. I literally did a John Lennon and did the whole interview propped up against my pillows in bed.
After the interview, we all went down to the Occupy Wall Street headquarters located on the second floor of a college again in midtown. It was kind of scary. For promoting peaceful protests, I wouldn't be surprised if they get violent. The graffiti that was covering the walls and some of the floor sounded pretty militant. I sat in on three different conversations and they all had different goals with two common threads; they wanted to keep "occupying" this school or move on to the next. The other thing that was in the air was the fear of being raided. It was around 7pm and there wasn't that many people in the space so I would think they would have gotten raided during their planning meeting at 8pm. We successfully left the building before it was raided, but we did see several police vans parked within a block of the space. I did collect OWS propaganda newspapers and various printed material including a rough blue print to interrupt the Macy's Day Parade. I couldn't believe they just had it sitting in the old protest signs. One thing is for sure; they don't have a central goal further than being pissed off and occupying things.
After that we took a taxi down to ground zero and we found that the visitors center was really a crowded gift shop. I found it revolting and we left quickly.
While we were there both the Whitney and MoMA were closed for Tuesday, but I have some power in NYC and Greg and I were allowed in with a curator tour. The museums were empty. It's a great way to see the art. I spoke at the opening dinner and it went very well. I have no problem with public speaking and I decided what to talk about in about 30 seconds. My speech was cohesive and well received.
We flew back on Thanksgiving and the airports were nearly empty. It was awesome. I went to the Macy's Day Parade and somehow managed to get a spot three people back in Times Square. By the evening we were back in Colorado and eating Thanksgiving Dinner at my brother's house. It was the perfect day.
The bottom line is that I weighed in at 333 which represents 77 pounds lost since my surgery on August 3rd. I should pass the New Years eve at 320 or less. I should be 280 pounds by my birthday on March 19th. The best present ever. I will be at my ideal weight by December 2012 at the latest.
Friday, November 11, 2011
One week later the band is working fine
For a while I was doubting the effectiveness of the lap-band. It was really more of "I thought it might be leaking." Well, it's not leaking and that last 1cc fill seems to have reduced the band aperture to the point where I can feel it when I drink too fast and once I've taken a few bites. The hunger pains are not completely gone. Yesterday I ate as instructed. Three meals of 1/4 cup and it was hard. I would do much better with 1/2 cup, but the idea is that you don't stretch out the esophagus above the band. Some people deliberately stretch it out, thus rendering the surgery less effective if not completely negated. It seems stupid.
How does the properly inflated band actually feel like?
As I previously mentioned, the first thing I do in the morning is take my bipolar meds (Lamictal and Lorasapam), bariatric supplements, vitamins (primarily vitamin D3x6), hypo-thyroid pill, and, finally my oxycodone for spleen pain. And every other day I take a water pill and subsequent potassium log (they'r big, I have to chew that one up, but it doesn't taste bad.). So this morning I took 15 pills. I can take a few of the smaller pills at the same time, and then one at a time. I can feel each one sliding through the band opening so I have to take my time and let each pill clear. It fells like there is a siphon behind my sternum. I can feel it even more with cold water. If I should happen to lay down before the water goes through, the water will try to drain back out of my mouth.
At breakfast I can feel a traffic jam if I eat something with substance or good texture. I love malt o meal, but it goes right through. An egg is better, however, I like to cook my egg with a dash of cheese, some hash browns, and salsa. It really ends up being twice the size of my meal so I save the other half for lunch. I can kind of feel it, but when I start drinking after an hour or so I can sometimes still feel some of the food and then it power slides through. I'm not supposed to be drinking coffee but I do. However, I can't even use mouthwash that has alcohol.
Lunch and dinner are pretty much the same. On water or liquids 15 mins before eating and no water for an hour after, which means you really need to drink a lot of water when you can.
For some bizarre reason, I have more trouble swallowing my night time meds than I do the morning meds. Maybe it's because I want to lay down and I can't until the meds clear. Nonetheless, I think I'm pretty safe at saying that I can lose 15 per month now. I've just about lost 70 pounds since August 3rd. I'm still hoping I can lose 10 more pounds by my trip to NYC on the 21st. Anything I can do to make the seats more comfortable. 23 inch butt into a 17 inch seat. Ouch.
One last point: My bipolar meds have been fairly consistent and stable, but, if I miss my morning meds I become argumentative by the afternoon. I am that sensitive to my meds.
How does the properly inflated band actually feel like?
As I previously mentioned, the first thing I do in the morning is take my bipolar meds (Lamictal and Lorasapam), bariatric supplements, vitamins (primarily vitamin D3x6), hypo-thyroid pill, and, finally my oxycodone for spleen pain. And every other day I take a water pill and subsequent potassium log (they'r big, I have to chew that one up, but it doesn't taste bad.). So this morning I took 15 pills. I can take a few of the smaller pills at the same time, and then one at a time. I can feel each one sliding through the band opening so I have to take my time and let each pill clear. It fells like there is a siphon behind my sternum. I can feel it even more with cold water. If I should happen to lay down before the water goes through, the water will try to drain back out of my mouth.
At breakfast I can feel a traffic jam if I eat something with substance or good texture. I love malt o meal, but it goes right through. An egg is better, however, I like to cook my egg with a dash of cheese, some hash browns, and salsa. It really ends up being twice the size of my meal so I save the other half for lunch. I can kind of feel it, but when I start drinking after an hour or so I can sometimes still feel some of the food and then it power slides through. I'm not supposed to be drinking coffee but I do. However, I can't even use mouthwash that has alcohol.
Lunch and dinner are pretty much the same. On water or liquids 15 mins before eating and no water for an hour after, which means you really need to drink a lot of water when you can.
For some bizarre reason, I have more trouble swallowing my night time meds than I do the morning meds. Maybe it's because I want to lay down and I can't until the meds clear. Nonetheless, I think I'm pretty safe at saying that I can lose 15 per month now. I've just about lost 70 pounds since August 3rd. I'm still hoping I can lose 10 more pounds by my trip to NYC on the 21st. Anything I can do to make the seats more comfortable. 23 inch butt into a 17 inch seat. Ouch.
One last point: My bipolar meds have been fairly consistent and stable, but, if I miss my morning meds I become argumentative by the afternoon. I am that sensitive to my meds.
Friday, November 4, 2011
New adjustment and the end of hunger pains... I hope
I'm a little frustrated because I am still at 347. Now I am quite bloated this morning. I can tell because my home scale weigh -in should have been better and I took my lasix (water pill) this morning and I have already peed like four times and it's only 8am.
On the 2nd of November I had an early adjustment in the aperture of the band. They added one more cc. I'm sure I am at at least 5cc or maybe 6cc. I got a little confused by the doctors notes from the previous saline addition. Nonetheless, it seems to have worked. My food is staying in place above the ring and water only trickles through. I have to be careful with my meds because I could easily get them stuck and then I would have to wait until they dissolved.
So now I am sticking to the 1/4 cup rule three times a day. I really want to kick this weight loss up a notch. Last night I measured out exactly 1/4 cup of marinaded chicken bits and they stayed in place until I started sipping water. The idea is to keep the food above the ring so your body (stomach) stops creating the acid that makes you hungry. My biggest foe has been my raging appetite. If I can rid myself of the physical and mental hunger than I can lose the appropriate amount of weight.
This morning I made a scrambled egg with some ham bits and a pinch of cheese. When I measured it, it was too much by two times. So I divided it and I will have the rest for lunch. One egg is too much. It surprised me too.
My estimates of loss were too optimistic. I think I can weight 330 by November 21st. In December I should be able to lose at least 15 pounds, so I should finish the year at 315. If I only lose 10 pounds per month then I should around 290 to 280 by my birthday. At that point I really won't be that freaked out by slower weight loss. After all, at 280 by March 19th would be an overall lose of 130 pounds. I would settle for 120.
The best part of this weight loss tool is that I shouldn't ever gain the weight back. Life changer.
On the 2nd of November I had an early adjustment in the aperture of the band. They added one more cc. I'm sure I am at at least 5cc or maybe 6cc. I got a little confused by the doctors notes from the previous saline addition. Nonetheless, it seems to have worked. My food is staying in place above the ring and water only trickles through. I have to be careful with my meds because I could easily get them stuck and then I would have to wait until they dissolved.
So now I am sticking to the 1/4 cup rule three times a day. I really want to kick this weight loss up a notch. Last night I measured out exactly 1/4 cup of marinaded chicken bits and they stayed in place until I started sipping water. The idea is to keep the food above the ring so your body (stomach) stops creating the acid that makes you hungry. My biggest foe has been my raging appetite. If I can rid myself of the physical and mental hunger than I can lose the appropriate amount of weight.
This morning I made a scrambled egg with some ham bits and a pinch of cheese. When I measured it, it was too much by two times. So I divided it and I will have the rest for lunch. One egg is too much. It surprised me too.
My estimates of loss were too optimistic. I think I can weight 330 by November 21st. In December I should be able to lose at least 15 pounds, so I should finish the year at 315. If I only lose 10 pounds per month then I should around 290 to 280 by my birthday. At that point I really won't be that freaked out by slower weight loss. After all, at 280 by March 19th would be an overall lose of 130 pounds. I would settle for 120.
The best part of this weight loss tool is that I shouldn't ever gain the weight back. Life changer.
Friday, October 28, 2011
November 21 goal expectation
I would like to lose 25 pounds by November 21st. Roughly, that's one pound a day. I should weigh in at 322 by my flight to NYC. Remember; seats are only 17" across. I won't be bouncing around the seat, but I should fit.
Benchmarks
November 4th = 340
November 8th = 335
November 12th = 330
November 16th = 325
November 20th = 320
November 21st = enough to fit in seat I hope
How will I get there? Serious diet control and 2 miles five times a week.
Monday, October 24, 2011
I still lost weight!
I thought I totally screwed up the last month. While I was running back and forth from Arkansas, I thought over the three weeks I had blown my diet. I could barely feel the band, but I do now. The last adjustment was great, but still I thought I was doing poorly. I had a lot of trouble breaking the hunger feelings.
However, I was just updating the lose250.com site and I have lost 17 pounds since September 26th! I bet I can lose another 3 pounds in the next few days. That would basically be 20 pounds on a crappy month. Pretty cool. I'm happy, but I really need to lose a fast 20 to 30 pounds before the 21st of November. I have a three and a half hour flight to NYC and the seats are only 17 inches across. Even with 30 pounds lost it will be tight, but nothing like it would be today.
My exercise schedule went a bit off kilter, but I've still been in the gym three times during the week and at least one if not two mountain hikes a weekend. We go on this path that is a challenging climb of about 500 feet and then back down and up some more (2 miles). I think I was doing the course at about one and a half hours four or five weeks ago, but I get better each time. This Saturday I tried to go faster than I ever had. My goal was one hour. I did it in 53 minutes. And I was seriously sore, but I went to the gym on Sunday anyway. All I did was jog /walk fast for 30 minutes and I reached my goal of two miles. I thought I would be super sore today, but I feel better than I did on Saturday night.
In order to lose the goal weight I need to exercise everyday. I ran out of time to get to the gym today so I raked the backyard. I didn't even break a sweat. Tomorrow I must get to the gym. Besides, we are supposed to have a snow storm on Wednesday. Today it was 79 degrees. Colorado weather is weird.
However, I was just updating the lose250.com site and I have lost 17 pounds since September 26th! I bet I can lose another 3 pounds in the next few days. That would basically be 20 pounds on a crappy month. Pretty cool. I'm happy, but I really need to lose a fast 20 to 30 pounds before the 21st of November. I have a three and a half hour flight to NYC and the seats are only 17 inches across. Even with 30 pounds lost it will be tight, but nothing like it would be today.
My exercise schedule went a bit off kilter, but I've still been in the gym three times during the week and at least one if not two mountain hikes a weekend. We go on this path that is a challenging climb of about 500 feet and then back down and up some more (2 miles). I think I was doing the course at about one and a half hours four or five weeks ago, but I get better each time. This Saturday I tried to go faster than I ever had. My goal was one hour. I did it in 53 minutes. And I was seriously sore, but I went to the gym on Sunday anyway. All I did was jog /walk fast for 30 minutes and I reached my goal of two miles. I thought I would be super sore today, but I feel better than I did on Saturday night.
In order to lose the goal weight I need to exercise everyday. I ran out of time to get to the gym today so I raked the backyard. I didn't even break a sweat. Tomorrow I must get to the gym. Besides, we are supposed to have a snow storm on Wednesday. Today it was 79 degrees. Colorado weather is weird.
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
The last lapband adjustment worked
The surgeon had injected saline fluid twice before, but he was being conservative. However, on my last appointment on October 14, I asked for some real liquid. At first he must have added 5cc because when I took a test drink of water it hurt very much. So then he backed it off just a bit and the next water test indeed drained. So we left it there because I'm tired of not feeling it.
Okay. I feel it now. I can only take sips of water and I really have to chew up my food. In addition, I must keep to the 1/4 cup rule because they is simply no more room than that. I just ate a small bit of chicken that couldn't have been more than 1/4 cup, but it hurt my chest anyway. The chicken did the same thing last night when I actually measured it. I guess some foods hurt but don't make you throw it back up. I have eaten too fast. Either way, ouch.
I think I will be able to lose weight at a rapid rate now. I need some quick weight loss before my trip in NYC. The seats are only 17 inches across and I am a bit more. I think if I lose 25-30 before the trip, I shouldbe more comfortable.
Okay. I feel it now. I can only take sips of water and I really have to chew up my food. In addition, I must keep to the 1/4 cup rule because they is simply no more room than that. I just ate a small bit of chicken that couldn't have been more than 1/4 cup, but it hurt my chest anyway. The chicken did the same thing last night when I actually measured it. I guess some foods hurt but don't make you throw it back up. I have eaten too fast. Either way, ouch.
I think I will be able to lose weight at a rapid rate now. I need some quick weight loss before my trip in NYC. The seats are only 17 inches across and I am a bit more. I think if I lose 25-30 before the trip, I shouldbe more comfortable.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
To lose or not to lose
The day that my father-in-law had his first stroke I was on track to lose another spectacular amount of weight. We took off that evening to Arkansas and I ate like crap. You know; highway food and snacks to keep me awake. After two more round trips to Arkansas I couldn't feel the obstruction of the lapband. Actually, I can't remember feeling it even after the last surgeon appointment where he added saline to my ring.
Basically what happened was I ate what I shouldn't have when I shouldn't have. It was like a lap band vacation. Granted, the stress and sorrow were near overwhelming as he took his last breath on September 30th, his 69th birthday, but I should have tried harder.
Part of my complaint shortly after my last surgeon appointment was that I felt hungry. Like mad dog hungry. I think if I had stayed at home and in my gym everyday I still could have lost 20 more pounds, but I didn't. I guess I should cut myself some slack considering the unusual circumstances, but I remain disappointed that I will have lost only 10 pounds in the last month.
I need to fly to NYC on November 21 on business and it is a four hour flight from Denver. The seats in United Airlines economy section are only 17 inches across. First class only has three more inches, but we can't worry about that. I can't afford it. So I found a chair in the house that was 17 inches across and I could shoe horn my way in, but it would be very uncomfortable like my last trip to NYC.
This Friday I have another appointment and hopefully I can get him to inject a good amount of saline so I can feel it. I'am sure I would be more comfortable if I lost 20 to 30 pounds before my trip. Yes, 30 pounds. That's my goal.
Basically what happened was I ate what I shouldn't have when I shouldn't have. It was like a lap band vacation. Granted, the stress and sorrow were near overwhelming as he took his last breath on September 30th, his 69th birthday, but I should have tried harder.
Part of my complaint shortly after my last surgeon appointment was that I felt hungry. Like mad dog hungry. I think if I had stayed at home and in my gym everyday I still could have lost 20 more pounds, but I didn't. I guess I should cut myself some slack considering the unusual circumstances, but I remain disappointed that I will have lost only 10 pounds in the last month.
I need to fly to NYC on November 21 on business and it is a four hour flight from Denver. The seats in United Airlines economy section are only 17 inches across. First class only has three more inches, but we can't worry about that. I can't afford it. So I found a chair in the house that was 17 inches across and I could shoe horn my way in, but it would be very uncomfortable like my last trip to NYC.
This Friday I have another appointment and hopefully I can get him to inject a good amount of saline so I can feel it. I'am sure I would be more comfortable if I lost 20 to 30 pounds before my trip. Yes, 30 pounds. That's my goal.
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
My father-in-law past on
In the past three weeks I have driven 1,000 miles (one way) to Arkansas because my father-in-law had a stroke and then had more strokes the one day that we had returned home and we went back. This time it was for his funeral. In all, I drove 7,000 miles (11,260 km) in the last month.
The trips and time spent in pure stress have wreaked havoc on my diet and my bipolar disorder. I ate like crap and I don't feel any "lap band" resistance so I didn't lose weight! I'm lucky that I didn't gain weight.
Anyway, we got in from Booneville Arkansas to our home in Lakewood Colorado around 2:30am. I drove a one hundred miles out of Boonville and then let my wife drive so I could nap in preparation for my marathon drive through the night so she could sleep and be ready to get up at 5am for work.
I completely trash my body. During the last 250 miles I felt like shit. I was nauseous and my spleen and liver hurt like crazy. I had to stop once because I was sure that I was going to vomit. Once I arrived home I was shaking and I had a fever. Nasty nasty nasty. I felt so bad I couldn't believe it. I slept until 1:30pm and then went back to sleep for another nap and now I'm ready for some more sleep. The stress and the drives have kicked my butt. I'm sorry to say that I am glad I don't have to make that drive again for a very long time and under different circumstances.
Checking out for a much needed third sleep.
The trips and time spent in pure stress have wreaked havoc on my diet and my bipolar disorder. I ate like crap and I don't feel any "lap band" resistance so I didn't lose weight! I'm lucky that I didn't gain weight.
Anyway, we got in from Booneville Arkansas to our home in Lakewood Colorado around 2:30am. I drove a one hundred miles out of Boonville and then let my wife drive so I could nap in preparation for my marathon drive through the night so she could sleep and be ready to get up at 5am for work.
I completely trash my body. During the last 250 miles I felt like shit. I was nauseous and my spleen and liver hurt like crazy. I had to stop once because I was sure that I was going to vomit. Once I arrived home I was shaking and I had a fever. Nasty nasty nasty. I felt so bad I couldn't believe it. I slept until 1:30pm and then went back to sleep for another nap and now I'm ready for some more sleep. The stress and the drives have kicked my butt. I'm sorry to say that I am glad I don't have to make that drive again for a very long time and under different circumstances.
Checking out for a much needed third sleep.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
The worst part of bariatric surgery - supplements/vitamins
So they tell you over and over that you'll have to take bariatric vitamins/supplements everyday for the rest of your life. Not a big deal. I've always taken vitamins and received B12 shots every month. You need the vitamins because you will eat like 2-3 oz per meal and it is usually animal and soy based proteins. If you don't eat proteins you'll get sick and lose lots of hair.
Before my surgery I ordered some vitamins from a popular and reputable bariatric supplement company. I'm sure that if you google bariatric vitamins that this company would pop up in the first three listings in and below the paid ads. I ordered the cherry flavored. The problem is that they smell like cherry and taste like poop. Seriously, I gag every time I take them.
But, I did some more research because I was sure there was something better out there. I found out that almost everybody on the review for my vitamin and many others hated their taste. But, I did find one vitamin that got solid reviews and everyone said they tasted great and they were cheaper than the ones I ordered. They were, of all places, at the Walgreens right down the street. They were nearly half the price and they do taste great. Kind of like a vitamin C orange flavor with no after taste. They are from a company called "Optisource" for $25.00 for 120 tablets. If you've had the lapband you should chew up three to four a day.
Just to back up this story; my wife tried to eat one of the old ones and immediately spit them into the toilet and rinsed her mouth out and brushed her teeth frantically. I had to laugh. Then she ate one of these Optisource chewable tablets and she didn't throw up. Rather, she agreed with me and the other reviewers. These vitamins are as powerful as the others and they taste fine.
Before my surgery I ordered some vitamins from a popular and reputable bariatric supplement company. I'm sure that if you google bariatric vitamins that this company would pop up in the first three listings in and below the paid ads. I ordered the cherry flavored. The problem is that they smell like cherry and taste like poop. Seriously, I gag every time I take them.
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| I highly recommend these |
Just to back up this story; my wife tried to eat one of the old ones and immediately spit them into the toilet and rinsed her mouth out and brushed her teeth frantically. I had to laugh. Then she ate one of these Optisource chewable tablets and she didn't throw up. Rather, she agreed with me and the other reviewers. These vitamins are as powerful as the others and they taste fine.
Monday, September 26, 2011
The roller coaster of emotions- My father-in-law's deterioration
It has been a difficult two weeks. On Monday the 12th of September, my father-in-law, Jerry, had a massive stroke. We drove from Colorado to Little Rock Arkansas that afternoon and arrived the next morning. It is nearly a 1,000 mile trek and I had to abuse my manic tendencies to drive the distance so my wife would be rested when we got to the hospital.
After five days he wasn't responding, but he seemed stable so we came home so Cheri could go to work on Monday. On Monday morning I called to check in with my mother-in-law and she told me he was having strokes on the other side of his body. I freaked. I thought that this was it so we drove back down to Arkansas because we didn't want her mom to be alone during this crisis. The week wore on and one moment he seemed to know that we were there and then he would not respond at all, but he remained stable so we came home last Saturday. I haven't called in to see how he's doing today. At this point our next trip will be for his funeral.
All of this driving for 14 hours straight and eating truck stop crap along with hospital food and fast food and just plain crappy food coupled with the fact that I had intentionally threw myself into hypo-mania four times plus having recently come off of a bad bipolar episode not only exhausted me, but it also changed the weight loss trend from down to stagnant to up.
Frankly, I didn't have the emotional will power to stay on my diet, plus I really don't feel the lapband yet. I need a few more adjustments so I can actually feel it and so I am truly restricted in food intake. Right now I think I could pretty much eat anything I want so losing weight is pure will power.
While I stopped losing weight, thus solidifying the truth that the lapband is a tool not a solution, I didn't gain all that much and I should be back down to pre-Jerry levels by the end of the week. At this point I will be happy to have lost 70 pounds by the time I go to NYC Thanksgiving week. Today I am at 43 pounds lost and I will be back to 50 pounds lost quickly... unless I have to run to Arkansas soon.
After five days he wasn't responding, but he seemed stable so we came home so Cheri could go to work on Monday. On Monday morning I called to check in with my mother-in-law and she told me he was having strokes on the other side of his body. I freaked. I thought that this was it so we drove back down to Arkansas because we didn't want her mom to be alone during this crisis. The week wore on and one moment he seemed to know that we were there and then he would not respond at all, but he remained stable so we came home last Saturday. I haven't called in to see how he's doing today. At this point our next trip will be for his funeral.
All of this driving for 14 hours straight and eating truck stop crap along with hospital food and fast food and just plain crappy food coupled with the fact that I had intentionally threw myself into hypo-mania four times plus having recently come off of a bad bipolar episode not only exhausted me, but it also changed the weight loss trend from down to stagnant to up.
Frankly, I didn't have the emotional will power to stay on my diet, plus I really don't feel the lapband yet. I need a few more adjustments so I can actually feel it and so I am truly restricted in food intake. Right now I think I could pretty much eat anything I want so losing weight is pure will power.
While I stopped losing weight, thus solidifying the truth that the lapband is a tool not a solution, I didn't gain all that much and I should be back down to pre-Jerry levels by the end of the week. At this point I will be happy to have lost 70 pounds by the time I go to NYC Thanksgiving week. Today I am at 43 pounds lost and I will be back to 50 pounds lost quickly... unless I have to run to Arkansas soon.
Friday, September 23, 2011
Family emergency
I'm sorry I have been absent, but my father-in-law had a stroke two weeks ago and we drove down to Little Rock Arkansas for a week and he seemed to stabilize so we we returned home just to hear that he was having strokes on the other side. Hence, we packed back up and returned to Arkansas. Miraculously, he is still holding on. I wouldn't call him stable, but I would call him critical.
One advantage to being bipolar is that I can intentionally throw myself into a hypo-manic state and drive for 15 hours at a shot. Little Rock Arkansas is just under 1,000 miles for our house. I believe that translates to around 1,600 kilometers. Anyway, I have now done that three times and after coming off a horrible bipolar episode I think my body is getting tired.
My diet has been horrible as well. When your on the road and stressed out it's very hard to say no to food, however, I am disappointed in my apparent weight gain so I am putting myself onto a liquid diet for about four days or so to get myself back into the groove.
One advantage to being bipolar is that I can intentionally throw myself into a hypo-manic state and drive for 15 hours at a shot. Little Rock Arkansas is just under 1,000 miles for our house. I believe that translates to around 1,600 kilometers. Anyway, I have now done that three times and after coming off a horrible bipolar episode I think my body is getting tired.
My diet has been horrible as well. When your on the road and stressed out it's very hard to say no to food, however, I am disappointed in my apparent weight gain so I am putting myself onto a liquid diet for about four days or so to get myself back into the groove.
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Bipolar low side
Last week I could tell I was being hypo-manic and what goes up must come down. Hypo- manic is a state in which I don't really feel like sleeping and I gain an ever growing sense of euphoria and grandiosity. My mood could be characterized as persistent and irritable. I can also tell when the mania is at full swing because I have little hallucinations. More like a slight of eye. Mostly I get a hair trigger against anyone who gets into my way. This manic state was somewhat mitigated by the fact that I had an out-of -town guest so I was trying to be on my best behavior.
However, I could feel myself headed to the edge. Once Robert left I didn't have anything to hold me back and I fell into a deep depression. You go way up and then way down. Hence, bipolar disorder. Right no I'm feeling pretty down, but I don't have any reason to be. Robert helped my move my book in the right direction. Thanks Rob. And this morning we will go on our Saturday hike up at Elk Meadows and then a Colorado Rockies game this afternoon AND football is in full swing tomorrow and I have a real strong fantasy football team. See? Everything is great and I feel like crawling into a hole.
However, I could feel myself headed to the edge. Once Robert left I didn't have anything to hold me back and I fell into a deep depression. You go way up and then way down. Hence, bipolar disorder. Right no I'm feeling pretty down, but I don't have any reason to be. Robert helped my move my book in the right direction. Thanks Rob. And this morning we will go on our Saturday hike up at Elk Meadows and then a Colorado Rockies game this afternoon AND football is in full swing tomorrow and I have a real strong fantasy football team. See? Everything is great and I feel like crawling into a hole.
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Quick report- New Measurements
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| Photo of me with one of my paintings |
The following posts are taken directly from my bariatric progress log on www.lose250.com. I've only copied the initial measurement entry and today's entry and then a bit on what they mean.
August 2, 2011- Day before surgery: Measurements from pre-op at Dr. Tillquist's office on July 29, 2011: weight ~ 413 pounds; neck 21"; waist 62"; bicep 21"; thigh 30" BMI = 60.98. Feeling pretty good. More excited than scared. On a pre-surgical liquid diet. I hope I'll be able to sleep tonight. I need to be at the hospital by 5am for a 7:30 surgery. I should be home by mid afternoon.
September 3, 2011 - One month. New measurements- neck 21"(no change), waist 54"(-8), bicep 21"(nc), thigh 30"(nc), BMI 53.3(-7.68) HS 361.4
If you adjust the initial weight for summer clothing then my first weigh in was actually 410 pounds, so today's weigh in at 361.4 represents a loss of almost 50 pounds. I continue to lose about a pound a day. In addition, the resulting weight loss has moved me from a Body Mass Index of 60.98 to 53.3 which is far more than I could have reasonably hoped for.
While most of my measurements remained the same, my waist has been reduced by 8 inches IN ONE MONTH! Yes, this amazing weight loss could not have been possible without the surgery, but my commitment to the volume of food and my extremely, almost excessive, exercise routine has sped things up. My loss is not necessarily normal, but it is obviously possible if the patient works their ass off... literally. That's it. I'm too tired to continue. Thanks for visiting.
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