Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Wednesday June 22nd 2011 - And some days just suck

Today sucks. I'm wired different than most people. Bipolar suffers are wired differently than others. We take chances and hang ourselves way out on a limb. We go for broke and fail to see the barriers of normal life. That is why so many bipolar people do such fantastic over the top things. That's why some of our greatest bipolar leaders like Lincoln or Churchill have done the impossible. Its because they fail to recognize impossible.

I'm that way. I can't do anything half way. I'm all in or not. When I'm manic nothing is impossible, but, when I'm depressed, nothing works. Today sucks. It seems like everything is working against me. I do so many positive things. I know that. I do things that other people wouldn't even consider trying. I genuinely think there is nothing I can't do if I apply myself. Of course, that's silly. Everyone has limitations, I just don't recognize mine.

But today, I just feel defeated, frustrated, lonely, and hopeless. On the bright side, I'll probably bounce out of this despair when I cycle up. Just have to hang one until then.

Oh yeah, remember that great idea about the peer to peer financing? It only works if other people care. Even though I sent out info to my friends on facebook and my family and friends via email, no one that I know has even invested $25. So I guess that's what my life is worth. Less than $25. Being bipolar sucks.

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